Game On Diet Update

When I decided last month I wanted to lose 50 lbs, I was just coming off my umpteenth bout of food poisoning in the last year. My whole body was sore from illness but also from not moving around.  I also had really bad depression that had lasted for weeks. But I wasn't ready to do anything yet.  I wasn't ready for change, because what if the change was for the worst instead of the better?  I was afraid of any more challenges.  I was afraid to be too hungry, afraid of the pain of working out, afraid of wasting my time and becoming frustrated. I was afraid of becoming obsessed with it and possibly becoming more miserable.

I'm doing all the things I stubbornly said I wouldn't do, such as track what I eat, weigh myself, and eating reduced fat cheese.  And you know what?  I'm not hating life as much as I thought I would. Sure it's a lot to think about, but it's an adjustment and I have to be patient.

But there are things that are happening that outweigh all that.  I've learned that I like the taste of broccoli by itself. I learned that when I'm running, looking up to the sky to see the leaves dancing in the breeze brings my heart joy. I'm getting a lot more sleep. The pain I thought I'd have from working out is not as painful as being inactive was. And even if I'm a little bit hungry, I go to bed looking forward to each day because I get to eat again!  I took eating for granted before and actually dreaded eating.  Now I count down the minutes until my next meal.  Does that sound bad?

However there are many things I'm looking forward to even more than eating, or losing weight, or anything having to do with dieting. I'm very focused right now, but there are other wonderful or important things in life.

Like kitties.


And husbands.




And friends.  And being there no matter what.

Lisztomania ... Think less but see it grow ... Like a riot, like a riot, oh!

Haha, now that's in your head too. I haven't been in the mood to write lately, what with all of my energy going toward, work, school, and weight loss. 

I don't have anything to say about mob mentalities that isn't depressing as hell, so here, have a list!

 

Things I'm excited about:

*I'm currently 213.6 lbs. I started this year 225 lbs.

*I did some running Monday. Outside. At least a full minute of sprinting.

*I'm going to run again tonight. Outside!

*There were kitties on New Girl last night.

*I'm less ravenous today.  For some reason, for the first time on the whole diet, I was really hungry yesterday. And I don't feel as bad today!  That makes me think, though, that I will be really hungry tomorrow.  I think tomorrow would be a great day to have a cheat meal.

*I get to eat two times at home tonight because I had to wait until 8:30am to eat breakfast.

 

Things I am worried about:

*I must shrink down to 212.3lbs by Monday, and then 210.1lbs the week after. And I'm not a magician. 

*I must get a homework assignment done by Thursday or it will be past due its 1-week grace period.

*Coworkers brought in Fisher's Popcorn and KitKat bars and now I must either plan their death or steal all the snacks and ration them for myself. Either way I have to put out effort and it is their fault.

*I am too verbose in my emails.

*I am too verbose in general.

 

Things I am not going to worry about:

*What anyone thinks of me

*If I'm going to die

*Whether or not I'm going to win the contest

*Pretty much anything catastrophic because it's not like it's going to prevent it.

String Cheese is NOT the answer!

Week 1, I lost lots of weight, a whole 2.7lbs!  Woo-hoo! Our team won because of points, life was good!

I celebrated by having five large slices of pizza with sausage, chicken, mushrooms, and pineapple with low sauce. And a giant chocolate muffin. And half a bag of Cheetos. And some Cheez-its. And then during the week I got lazy and had reduced-fat string cheese every meal.

And then I wondered why I was so headache-y and bloaty and sick.

SHUT UP! BIRD.

I didn't lose any weight this week (unless a miracle happens between now and tomorrow), but I didn't gain any either, at least not permanently. And I learned a valuable lesson about what my body can handle.

My body can handle lots of water.

My body laughs at Mountain Dew. It wants absolutely nothing to do with it.

My body loves and thrives on lots of exercise. Bring on the long walks!

My body wants lighter food, and lots of it!

My body is done with pizza. It told me, "Jenny! Knock it off with the pizza! I can't run on this!"

I can't wait to see that body through all of its many life lessons.

Friend Making Monday - YOU'RE TALKIN' TO THE LOOOOVE DOCTA

I'm pitching in my 2 cents for Friend Making Monday at All The Weigh In!

Here's their image and blurb and then I'll answer questions!

(If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section here at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!)

Relationships and Dating

1.  List five characteristics that you think are important in a significant other. 

1. DON'T BE A JERK: The most important characteristic is kindness.  I don't want to be with someone who isn't kind.   Kindness is the most important.  It shows your heart more than anything else will. You wouldn't believe how hard this is to find and how valuable this is. We all have our off days, but we're not going to work if you're mistreating me and other people regularly.

2. COMPATIBILITY: The second most important characteristic is that we actually want to be around each other. You can give me the blazing hot panties forever, but if I get tired of being around you it's just not going to work romantically.

So what makes me want to be around someone? The remaining three characteristics, duh.

3.WE NEED TO BOND OVER THINGS.  Opposites attract makes no sense to me. If all the things you like are boring, we'll have nothing to talk about.

4. HAVE THE HOTS FOR ME. We're going to have to make out and do thing to each other so be ridiculously, ridiculously good looking and think that I am ridiculously good looking .

5. BE A RESPONSIBLE ADULT. Don't have a bunch of really bad habits that make me feel unsafe like habitually drinking too much and not taking care of yourself properly and never have any money. 

Obviously, my husband fits all of these.

2.  If you had to choose between staying single for the next two years (as in, no dating at all,) or receiving $10,000, which would you choose?  I'm married and don't have that choice. But if I was single I'd probably take the money. And then I'd regret it because of course it would be at that moment I'd meet my soul mate or something and fall in love with them.  Then I'd have to pay back the money, but it would be worth it. This is horrible question!

3.  What is your relationship status?  Are you satisfied with it?  I'm married.  I love my husband. I chose the right guy.

4.  Would you date someone who has children?  No. Unless they are fur children.

5.  Would you date someone who’s shorter than you?  Absolutely! I have, actually, dated a couple guys shorter than me. People come in all shapes and sizes.

6.  Would you date someone who has different political views?  Yeah, but it depends on what they are. Some things are absolutely a deal breaker as a former social work major. My political views have changed a lot over the years and sometimes Greg and I have to sit down and talk when we disagree.

7.  If you were going on vacation together, would you choose the beach or the mountains?  Why can't I have both?  Some places have both!  The beach is closer so we tend to go to the beach more.

8.  How do you show someone that you’re interested in them? I try to see if they're interested too by asking them!  Usually they aren't though.  But I respect that and move on!  It sucks, but that's life until we can all read minds!

9.  Do you prefer to date people who are older than you or younger?  I prefer someone at the same life stage as me. I once dated someone who was close in age to me but we just weren't at the same life stage. I was independent, he lived with his parents. I had a job and was going to school at night and on my days off, he was trying to become pre-med and was going to college full time. His group of friends was much younger than my group of friends. While that was not the only reason we didn't work out, it was a hassle!

10.  Share some details of your dream date. I just want things to be special.  It doesn't matter where we are, whether it's cheap or fancy.  Do something to make it nice.  Point out all the nice things and enjoy them with me.  I went on a walk with my husband the other night as the sun was setting and we saw geese and a teeny tiny little turtle.  The lighting was just perfect. It was special.  That's all I require.

Okay, if you want to do it too, go answer the questions on your blog and comment on her blog!  Now go make friends!

On Food Addiction - Overdosing

I've had a food problem for as long as I can remember. Even as a child I would end up eating to the point of throwing up. I abused my body, building it up more and more to become used to eating to bursting, until my body adapted and I required that amount of food as a staple to my nutrition rather than the exception.

Then, sometime recently, I need more food.  More and more food.  Food wasn't meeting my emotional or physical needs anymore. I would try the craziest food.  I would try more of it.  I would take risks with food. Nothing made me feel full.  I lived in fear of starving, of being hungry.

I have a lot of anxieties and many of them revolve around physical discomfort leading to panic attacks.

I live in avoidance of panic attack.  Food, headphones, avoidance, staying inside, never going anywhere: this is my life and has been my life since I was very young.

However this week I make a change. I started with me.  I can't go out to Zumba?  I brought Zumba to me. Afraid of starving?  Eat five times a day and drink water until my stomach hurts with it. Afraid of panic attack?  Get enough sleep and manage your anxiety.

Today was my day off though.  I prepared for a binge day.  I bought all kinds of processed junk and thought, "Oh goody!  Food Christmas!"

But emotionally, I didn't need vast amounts of food.

And physically, I didn't want vast amounts of food.

A week into Game On and already I've broken the cycle of binge eating.  It's just too easy to overdose now.

Just a little bit of junk food today was too much and I got sick very quickly, without trying to, without meaning to. My stomach was just like, "STAHPPIT!"

You know what I'm looking forward to tomorrow?

Broccoli.

Water.

Bananas.

Avocado.

Zumba.

Cleaning.

Feeling rested.

I'm happy to just let the junk food sit there, untouched, as the exception it is supposed to be instead of the rule.

It's a relief.

FRIDAY FIVE AND PUPPY DOGS AND RAINBOWS AND BLOG THINGS AND WHATEVER LINK UP

If you have a blog, and it's Friday, apparently you're supposed to post photos of things that defined your week or whatever.

I decided to plagiarize all the photos, so if any of these are yours and you actually read this blog, then comment and say so I can do what needs to be done!  But I don't think anyone reads my stuff so here we go!

MY WEEK CONSISTED OF

CASHEWS

Cashews saved my butt this week.  They're the only nut I don't get sick of eating. On Game On Diet plan you have to eat a thumb sized amount of fat five times a day and sometimes I really am not in the mood to carry an avocado around all the live-long day.

ZUMBA

I was worried that doing 25 minutes of Zumba a day wasn't going to be enough exercise for me.  For some reason bouncing around the room with my arms in the air and my feet being fancy until I felt light-headed seemed too good to be true. However, on Game On Diet Plan you have to exercise at least 20 minutes a day. Every day, at least six days.  Even after a day where you've gone hard at the gym and you're sore and can't move for two days. EVEN THEN. After five straight days of Zumba, I really am starting to feel it in my core, butt, and limbs.  I was right to start out slow! If I had started out with something more intense I would have gotten injured. Now I want to join a class in person!

Hello, lover.

THERMOS

I've been using this thermos for my water and since I have to drink 3 liters of water a day we have an intimate relationship now. Ignore the price in the link as I got it for about $5 at some Target-like place.

HEADPHONES

My coworker eats and slurps and chews gum and loudly sniffles her snot at her desk all day.  With her mouth open. The whole day. In the hall. While walking by me. She has no awareness of how gross it is, so rather than ruin her day the way she's ruined mine I keep these near me at all times so I don't go crazy on her:

CAT

She likes to knock over my iPad in the middle of my Zumba Dance workout.  She knows I don't want her to do that and she has sneaky body language when she's about to lunge at it.

Here's where I link up to things!

and http://www.ilikebeerandbabies.com/2013/09/things-that-made-me-shoot-puppy-dogs.html?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter GO THERE AND ASK HER TO BUY ME A PONY

Day 4 - Game On - Quick Update

Hi Blog!

Well it's Day Four of the contest I am in and so far here are my findings:

I've been really lazy with meals.  The "major" cooking I've accomplished is stir frying broccoli and cauliflower each day. Most of my meals are grab and go, although I could make something super fancy and cut it into several servings, easily! Sticking to my food plan has been super easy.  And if I want something different I add a different spice!  One night it was ginger, another night garlic, and yet another onion!

Drinking all of my water has been easier this go round. One strategy for downing all of the water is to gulp down 32 oz immediately upon waking. Well, morning time is when I get a nervous tummy, and the last thing I want is anything in it. However, this time I thankfully haven't been experiencing anything wrong with my tummy, so I've been able to drink all I want.  In fact, 3 liters sometimes doesn't cut it and I need more than 3!

For some reason, even with a filter, I hate the taste of the water in my apartment.  Sadly,at home my water has to be store-bought in bottles. I know, I know, but I'm not going to drink water if it tastes icky! I suppose it isn't the greenest thing.  At work I use a giant thermos and fill it up twice a day to get 64oz of my 100 oz a day. I think on Saturdays and Sundays I'll have to figure something else out because I don't see drinking out of little bottles all weekend.

Zumba is lots of fun, even when by myself in my dining room with the table pushed back and the cat freaking out.  I just don't believe that I'm burning as much as they say I'm burning with Zumba.  It feels more of a light workout for me, but that might be because I'm still getting the steps down. At this point I'm just trying to get myself more active, but eventually my goal is to incorporate strength training and higher intensity, challenging workouts to my day. I should just be careful not to injure myself or burn myself out, but to make sure I'm making the most of every movement for now!

So far I've lost almost 1 lb, but I don't see me making my weight goal on a regular basis. And I have to keep reminding myself that is OK. Even though this contest is only for a month and I have money riding on it, my main goal is to lose the weight long term over the next six months and mostly take care of myself as best as I can.  I'm already feeling so much more lively and happier than I was a mere few days ago. The food isn't upsetting my tummy. I'm getting some circulation. Our floors and kitchen look better now that I keep them clean as part of my transformation.

Also, whether or not I win the $60 prize, this is better than anything I've ever tried to stick to on my own.

Game On Diet is BACK ON.

I wrote at the beginning of this month that I wanted to lose 50 lbs. And then I went on a glorious week-long eating binge filled with avocado and hummus sandwiches on sourdough, steak fries, cheese steak subs, endless slices of pizza, a vast amount of authentic Mexican food, endless pieces of candy, endless chips, endless junk food, really. I loved it, but it didn't make me feel too great.  In fact it made me feel throbbing headaches, terrible anxiety, bloated, nauseated, and just plain distracted. And it was interfering with my life.  I was missing out on a lot of things because I didn't feel well.

Then Joey, the brother I never had, decided to tell me he was planning a wedding for next June. Look, I don't mind being a little bit fat. 50 lbs from now I'll be a little bit fat, the kind that is size 12 and not really fat. But the way I was eating, I wasn't just keeping on the extra 80 (yes 80) or so lbs, I was going to gain 80 more, or die of a heart attack since I'm un-medicated Stage 2 Hypertensive.

How about no?

Over at The World According to Cindy, Cindy was able to reverse her enlarged fatty liver and get down to a healthy weight by running an online diet bet using the The Game On Diet Program. She's got her waist-size down to a heart-healthy level and she's actually where I would totally settle and be happy being, weight-wise. My high school friend Elizabeth was the first person I knew who tried The Game On Diet with her coworkers, and it seems to me she's lost 1/3 of her weight.  She can even run now, where before an injury was keeping her from even walking a whole lot.

So that's what I'm going to do.

Game On Diet Session 2013-8 Week 1
Current Weight 219.400 lbs
Goal Weight by Sunday September 15, 2013: 217.206 lbs

Sample Day Schedule
5am 32 oz of water and Zumba 20+ minutes
6am Breakfast

1 egg 2 egg whites
Apple, sliced and heated up in oven.
small amount of cashews

8am 16oz water
9am Snack/15 minute walk

thumb sized amount of cashews
2 cheese sticks
Banana

10am 16oz water
12pm Lunch

1 sliver of avocado
1/2 palm sized amount of chicken
1/2 palm sized reduced-fat cheese
1  fist sized amount of broccoli
1 whole-grain rye slice

2pm 16 oz water
3pm Snack/15 min walk

thumb sized amount of cashews
2 cheese sticks
Banana

4pm 16 oz water
6pm Dinner

1 small flatbread
palm sized reduced fat cheese
thumb size grapeseed oil
1 fist sized broccoli

1 Eggo Waffle as 100 calorie snack.

7pm Habits: Put away any clothes and towels and wipe down kitchen sink, counter, microwave, and stove.
10pm Sleep

Crap! I'd better get to bed or I'm totally going to lose points!

Cheer me on, as I intend on winning this bet!

The Time Stinky Jenny Went To Lush And Took A Shower

I've never been a sort of hygiene maven. I'm the type of person who would rather go days without showering, but can't because ew? But when I'm in the shower I'm in for ten minutes and I'm out. I don't use lotion. I don't exfoliate. Most of the time I don't even shave, mostly because I feel it is unnecessary. I actually don't take very good care of myself. My routine is basically neglect myself until something bad happens.

So when Kenny and Joey took me to LUSH for the first time in January and sent me home with nice things, I didn't use them. Mostly because I felt like they were so extravagant that I only could use them if I was doing something fancy. I felt like I wasn't good enough. I know that sounds silly. It's just bubble bath and hair stuff.

Then Joey took me again in the spring and I bought some lip balm. It was the best lip balm I've ever used. It's like butter for the lips.

Still I didn't use anything else. Keep in mind I did start washing my face with honey and began wearing makeup more, but I stopped that this summer because I fell into a depression and even stopped washing my hair on a regular basis.

Anyway, so Joey and Kim took me to LUSH again this weekend and I again touched all the soaps, thinking, "I can't buy something that is just going to sit in the closet because I don't feel like it's a special occasion enough to use it."

Then Kim and I started playing with glitter soaps. She rubbed it all over her beautiful skin and I started putting glitter from one of the soaps all over my eyelids.

An attendant asked if I needed help with anything.

I looked down at my legs. Now that I'm in my thirties, I have these dry, ashy, wrinkled calves. Mostly because I get out of the shower and don't moisturize. When you get to age 25, lotion is kind of important. And when I was in my teens I used it, but then I felt like it took too long for lotion to dry and I felt gooey and gross putting on clothes with lotion skin. Thus, grandma skin on the one part of my body that actually has visible muscles. Sad!

I asked the attendant, "Do you have any really good moisturizing soaps? I hate using lotion and I have dry skin."

Which lead me to buying something I know I wouldn't just let sit in the bathroom being fancier than I am, because it is useful:

I love it! I used it this morning all over my body, on my face and limbs and torso, and my skin feels like young people's skin. It doesn't feel waxy or gooey and I keep lifting it to my face and inhaling.

I'm going to have to get around to using all the other stuff in my LUSH stash.

I'm really glad to join the land of people who smell good.

Disclosure: I was not asked to do this blog or to promote Lush and the only free stuff I got was from my friends Joey and Kenny and that is because they are insanely generous and kind.  But if you want to send me free shit too that would be great!