Smile At Me

I haven't meant to disappear from the Internet.

 

Yeah, yeah.  Everyone who stops blogging starts their blog like this.

 

I get scared sometimes.  There's so much hate out there.  So much attacking.

 

I feel attacked sometimes just for being boring old me.  Just for being myself, enjoy what I enjoy, looking how I do, living how I live.

 

It's preposterous. In real life, nobody cares about that.  But on the Internet suddenly it's all important.

 

Maybe not for everybody, but for some.

 

It's bothered me lately how many people out there are just out and out rude and disgusting to each other, especially online.

 

Would you harass a stranger walking down the street with dead baby jokes to look good in front of your buddies?

 

Are you going to tap on people's shoulders while in line for the supermarket, "Hey, psst, gun control is communism!"

 

Lately I log onto my Facebook and Twitter and I log right back off like, "Ugh, just leave me alone."

 

In real life sometimes it can be just as bad.  Just traffic is stressful.  Or maybe I'm just a really bad driver.  I've had two people in the last few weeks tailgate me while shaking their fist and screaming at me.  All I'm doing is trying to move forward without hitting other cars.  They act like driving is a checkerboard and the more people you pass the sooner you'll get kinged.  So when one of them skidded out halfway through an intersection in my direction and I stopped to avoid it, and then spent the next five minutes on my rear and cussing me out, I just kept wishing for it to be over soon.

 

I don't want to be a part of this nastiness.

 

I want to be a warm puppy in the muscular arms of an old friend on sun-warmed grass.

 

I want to be Nutella on a hot croissant.

 

I want to be freshly shampooed hair escaping from the ponytail it dried in.

 

I want to be the welcoming smile you see when you look up from your shoes.